Now that a decision has been made to go out and find a suitable girl, here are some ground rules in the context of the Blessed One’s teachings
1. Absolutely No intoxicants period: I haven’t had intoxicants in several months and I’m not about to start now. Yes, the nights are going to be tough. But not too much tougher than the decision to give up Pick up and go for monogamy. This was probably part of what killed me in Club Toit, but what to do? I have accepted the Blessed One as my teacher. Now I must honor my Master.
2. No lying:
a. No deceptive lies regarding your age, your past, your work, your intentions. Don’t answer the question or change the topic, but no lying.
b. No petty lies. This usually includes those routines I use as a crutch such as “My friend in NYC/Mumbai who is has a GF but is still friends with his ex”. No made up stories that make me seem more interesting than I actually am. No made up anecdotes regarding my interesting friends. No made up anecdotes about places I visited or people I met or adventures I had.
c. God, what am I going to talk about during time when I am not feeling it? I don’t need routines when I’m feeling great. But what about times when I am feeling flat?
3. No trying to seduce women in whom you would not be interested in a long term relationship: can I make friends with them to get at their friends who might be a prospect?
4. No serial monogamy. If a girl is awesome, it is lifelong.
5. No impossibly high standards for achieving “awesome”
How the hell am I going to do this? Up to this point, the only thing I evaluated a woman for was whether I could lay her eventually or not. How the hell am I going to evaluate her worthiness as a long term prospect? What criteria should I use?
Have I taken up too big a challenge?
6. At the end of a sarging session, you shall give Metta (generate goodwill towards) everybody you interacted with that day at the end of your Vipassana sitting.
a. The girls and guys who were nice and polite and friendly to you are easy to give metta to. You shall wish them well in all their endeavors.
b. But you shall also give metta to the girls who were rude to you, who ignored you or who laughed at you. At the very least you will not generate any ill-will towards them.
c. You shall also give metta to the guys who cock-blocked you. At the very least you will not generate any ill will towards them.
d. It is possible that you might end up upsetting some people during the course of my pick up. You will mentally ask for their forgiveness and generate goodwill towards them.
e. You shall not be contemptuous of any body you consider to be having no game. Remember, Game is a conditioned response like any other and is subject to the same laws of impermanence or impersonality as any other phenomena. You may have it now, but you will lose it one day and there is no power in the Universe that can stop that.
There goes my much vaunted Killer instinct. There goes my Bad Boy allure. Is it possible I can attract any girl with an attitude like this? Should I just try to work harder at celibacy? Or should I go for an arranged marriage? But then what is the guarantee that the arranged marriage will last? These days in India arranged marriages are more fragile than the ones by mutual consent. No, It’s better I try to find my on girl. At least that way there are no surprises for her. And at the very least, I am going to learn a lot more about women and what they find attractive. A new adventure begins. Let’s see what happens.