Sarge Diary – 3: Text blooper and Have I met the one?

The emails I have written with so much effort have gone nowhere. As a commentator mentioned, emails are only for working women. Young girls simply do not have the intellectual ability or the inclination to be able to compose a thoughtful email. No point wasting time writing emails to young fillies. If a young chick does not want to give me her phone number, The hell with it. Facebook is an option as KrauserPUA has so effectively demonstrated. But I do not have facebook nor do I intend to get one in the future. So no more emails to young fillies. They have an attention span that meets the requirements only for texting.

On the day I landed in Singapore, I number closed a college Girl. I believe I ran pretty decent game on her and she did seem to be digging it. The set went so well according to me that I was too exhilarated to sarge anymore. Did I celebrate too soon? In hindsight, it looks like it and if today was any sort of indication, have learnt nothing from that experience. Here is the text exchange

Me: So did you sleep well at the concert? 😉

*She does not reply. I wait for a half day before sending the next one. Time to pull out the artillery and start teasing*

Me: So the band was that bad, huh? It happens, girl! Everybody cannot know all the cool bands like I do 😉
She: Concert was magical! You can go listen to them. They are called XYZ

*Aah! a response. Teasing works on young girls. What a surprise! Who would have thought? Let’s do some more *

Me: Okay. Thanks for Date idea # 26. You a publicist for the band by any chance? 😉
She: Nah, not at all

*Hmmm! Did i overdo the teasing? Asian girls! Let’s clarify. This is something I would never do with a Euro/Am Girl. They cannot get enough teasing. But this is unfamiliar territory for me. Take a risk*

Me: Haha! It’s called Teasing (Girl’s name). I take it you’re not used to it?
She: Hahaha…. I knew were teasing me. BTW, my name is (real name)

*Okay, she likes teasing. College Girls! Let’s keep at it and dispense with the smileys or the winky’s this time. And give her a nickname too while we are at it*

Me: You knew that? My my! At such a tender age too. Maturity beyond your years! Any other surprises for me, Ms. Rabbit-out-of-a-hat
She: You are too kind. I guess I age more than my years too haha! How was touring singapore?

*First, she simply did not get that I was again teasing her, patronizing her in the manner my mum used to when I was 4 calling me a big boy. Instead she thought, I was complimenting her. But at least there is a question. Showing some interest. Let’s hit her with the Statement of Intent*

Me: Touring singapore? Weren’t you the one supposed to show me around?

*Damn! should I have inserted a winky at the end of that text? Showing me around is too much investment to ask at this time. She does not reply for a few hours and then this*

She: I am too busy in this period

*Crap! that sets the frame. She thinks I am serious. To top it off, I am drunk when I receive that text. So I reply with this…WTF?*

Me: That’s totally cool. We can continue flirting like this over text messaging

*Total freeze out for a whole day. I guess they like the teasing, but not the flirting or any implication of it. Wow! I love learning about foreign cultures. Don’t you? Time for me to hit with something after a day*

Me: Oh, come on now! That was funny

*uh-huh! Total freeze out. I killed that set. Did the last text come out looking needy?*

When she replied with I am too busy in this period the correct response would be, “I am joking doofus, We’ve just met and I do not know if I will choke myself with my necktie after a couple hours of  talking to you. Let’s start with a coffee. It’s short, sweet and non-commital”. Anyhoo! What’s done is done. No point crying over spilt milk and all that. Time to move on.

Looking for apartments in SG is a bit tricky. Rent is expensive here and you may have to share your flat. You need roommates who are cool with you bringing chicks over to your pad. That, as I am discovering, is not quite a sure thing. This is Asia. Asian culture rules. Casual sex is not as big as in Euro/Am. Several landlords/flatmates have a no overnight guests rule. They have a no opposite sex guest rule. WTF, guys? Loosen up a bit. Be more fun. Stop being so stuck up and serious. Stop that moralistic attitude. Maybe that way you will not lose so many of your women to the white guys. Damn, are me and KFK the only Asians trying to give the white guys some sort of competition? I finally find the right flat-mates and the right landlord. You got it! All Europeans and Americans. All White. Seriously?!?

I am feeling a bit low on energy. Don’t feel like approaching women. Not approach anxiety, but rather a lack of interest. I’m not feeling it. Yet, there is this nagging feeling that I am wasting my time if don’t open any sets at all. I can’t sarge and I can’t not sarge. I pull a couple half-arsed approaches. They both bomb. The women can see my lack of intent. I am just going through the motions, just mouthing the lines, an employee just punching his time card.

And then she walks past me. A surge of energy passes through me. I stop. I turn. I follow her. I catch up with her, I tap her shoulder. I am a different person. She keeps walking but turns her head to look at me. I am looking at her. I keep walking with her. She is smiling a little. A very slight smile crosses my face, half wry, half mocking. I deliver the opener. This is my go to opener. I’ve used it so many times, that it usually feels stale. I usually cringe when I use it. But I don’t cringe this time. This time it feels natural. It feels fresh. It feels appropriate to the situation. It feels perfect. Her smile widens. She stops but does not face me. Is stop as well, but face her only half way. We are looking each other in the eye. For a rather long time. Without a word. But it does not feel strange. It feels like the most natural thing to do.

She: You are too kind
Me: Only when I get the right kind of stimulus

She Laughs. She introduces herself. Her hand is in mine. Whether she offered me her hand or I just took it, i do not remember. It was probably both. I introduce myself, her hand still in mine. I do not have to tell myself to hold her hand in mine for a long time. It just feels natural to hold her hand for such a long time. Half a minute later, it feels natural to let go off her hand…..gently, slowly. Not a moment too soon. Not a moment too late. Could not have done this if I rehearsed. Could not have done this if I tried. I AM a different person.

She: So where are you from?
Me: I’m from Injia. You must be from……wait don’t tell me …… Iceland

She laughs. She is of the same skin tone as I, Brown. Dark Brown.

Me: No.. don’t tell me. I need a second chance. I am a man after all.

She laughs again. This girl has a great sense of humor. I mean she understands my sophisticated Geographical humor. How rare is that? I squint, cock my head to one side, and then to another another, and make a great show of examining her physiognomy. She can’t stop laughing at my performance. Am I being an entertainment monkey? Maybe. But I just do not think so.

Me: You are from ……… drum roll please …… French Polynesia!
She: hahaha…..No way
Me: Really? You have that look that says Iceland or french polynesia.
She: hahahaha

We get talking about other stuff. Life in Singapore, my life in the states, comparisons. She loves the SG weather. She says I have a lot of energy. Hah! if only she saw me one minute before I approached her. Women do not understand how important the right kind of motivation is to men. We talk about the long home/work commutes in SG. I say how much better it would be if we all went to work with our favorite musical instruments and started off an impromptu song and dance band on the train. I make motions with my air guitar. She loves that. She says she wishes people in SG were a little more outgoing. You hear that, SG guys? Whatchu waiting for? Approach that hot chick NOW! Show her what we are. We talk about India, the trekking, the beaches. She has never been but would love to go. I make some jokes, “You like Indians? You like India? You want it to stay that way? Great! then don’t go to India.” I suggest where she should go for the first trip. She is rapt when listening to my trekking adventures (Yeah! I need to post on that). She has to go. We exchange numbers. But I don’t let her go. Not that she is eager to go.

Me: Okay! Before you go, at least tell me where you are from?
She: USA
Me: No way, you don’t have that vibe at all.

We talk some more. I tell her my stories in Texas and the cowboy jeans misunderstandings. We talk some more. She wants to be a Yoga teacher. Did she say a yoga teacher? That means meditation is a short step away. Could this be the one? My mind starts reeling. We part. I spend the next whole hour fantasizing about my future time with her. The first date, the first kiss, how I’ll charm her, How I’ll have sex with her, how I’ll make her come, then we’ll get married, meditate together, practice yoga together, attain enlightenment together and the kids will also be arahants. WTF? I tell myself to maintain equanimity and not get carried away. I remind myself of past euphoria which came to naught. No use! My mind is high on a euphoria drug. I try to bring my attention to my breath. I focus hard on my breath. No dice. My mind likes the fantasizing. It keeps straying from the breath and back to fantasizing. I can no longer sarge. I go home. God! I get euphoric so quickly! Get a grip on yourself, man!

A grip on myself is at a premium. I decide to text her as it seems natural.

Me: Great Funny bone (Girls name). Did I spell your name right? —masculineffort
She: Well, you are fun to listen to. Perfect spelling.
Me: Flattery will get you everywhere 😉
She:Ha! 🙂
Me: Haha…I’ll call you once my schedule settles down. We’ll have a good time.
She: sounds great.

Damn this euphoria. I decide to burn that Euphoria by writing this post. Mission accomplished. But I can’t go out and sarge now. It’s time to sleep. Bloody hell!


About masculineffort

A Man should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, seduce a woman, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.
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One Response to Sarge Diary – 3: Text blooper and Have I met the one?

  1. Pingback: Sarge Diary – 8: Sit on your texts & Day 2 planning | masculineffort

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