The Femininity Routine

One of the things striking about Asia is how feminine the women are. But they are pretty shy and not very confident. In America, the women are quite confident. So one way to get them sexual was to talk about how confident they came across as, how feminine it was, how masculine I felt around a confident woman and  and take it from there moving to deeper and deeper topics till you deliver that killer statement that literally gets her pussy wet. This worked great for me when I was in America. In singapore however, I am having to re-learn the whole damn game while working long hours. The women are NOT confident and so any attempt at this has fallen flat on its face. Hell, a direct approach blows up in my face here, while the U.S., the girls eyes used to light up at a direct approach. And the Euro/American women here all have husbands or boyfriends and so that option is closed to me. So i have to deal with Asian girls. And I’m going to have to work with some quality other than confidence when dealing with women in Singapore. That quality I would like to start experimenting with should be femininity. Why Femininity?

1. I value it in women. So I would like to talk about it. It would turn me on. Much better than rambling about pet shops and being cocky funny or some such boring shit. 

2. Women here have it in spades: That’s why I’m talking to her right?

3. I believe women value this quality in themselves, at least I hope they do. Then they too would like talking about it. It is also not really sexual. So she should be comfortable talking about it in the start.

4. When a woman talks about a quality she values, she will start feeling this quality. This will make her feel better about herself and turn her on while turning me on too. Once she is turned on a bit she will be open to deeper, more sexual topics. Once I am turned on, I will have the courage to broach deeper, more sexual topics. It’s fucking win win if done correctly

So, in this spirit, let’s start constructing the routine.


1. Opening qualifier: Do you consider yourself a feminine woman?

Some women may be non-plussed with this. For them, don’t wait for an answer. Proceed immediately to ground # 2. Some women will answer this with. Ofcourse, I’m female. In this case, proceed to ground # 1. 

2. Ground # 1: Well, I’m not sure what femininity means to you. But to me being feminine is not the same as being female. It is very similar to the case where being male is not the same as being masculine. I’m sure you’ve seen a few lady boys here in singapore or thailand if you’ve traveled there. They are male, but they are not masculine in my opinion. And you must have met several men who you liked and you probably had certain feelings for them. But I’m sure you don’t feel the same way about lady boys. So that’s why I say that the guys you were attracted to were masculine. But I’m curious, “What does being feminine mean to you?”

She probably will not be able to answer this, but you have her where you wanted her and where she should have been when you first posed that question. In a maelstrom of emotion, she probably has never been asked something like this. So you need to now go to ground # 2

3. Ground #2: For me, I’m usually seen as a masculine guy, but there are times, in certain situations where I don’t feel all that masculine. I’ve been observing myself for a while now and for me being masculine is all about being able to express myself as I am, not hiding my desires, not being afraid to be judged for my desires as a man, expressing that part of myself freely, with confidence and joyfully. And let me tell you this, sitting next to you, talking to you, i feel pretty masculine. But I think it is different for women. Especially for an sensitive/soulful/artistic/poetic woman like you, which is the vibe I’m getting from you.

At this point, it becomes important for her to say something. I hope after I’ve said this stuff, she starts to feel more feminine, is able to collect her thoughts.  I’m not sure what the hell she is going to say, this needs field testing. But whatever she says, it’s time to challenge her. You want her at her deepest level answering this question. You want this to be a question about her as a person. The answer must come from what she is feeling

4. The Challenge: Now, so, for you as a woman… * pause*…. I have a sense….. I don’t know …….You probably love a sense of humor and maybe quite a chatterbox yourself……But I want to know, what is it about you as a woman, that finds confidence/masculinity so attractive.  

Aaaah! She is again going to be at a loss for words. If done right, she’ll probably smile, she probably will be at a loss for words. But she’ll know what the hell you are talking about. She’ll be feeling it. So you need to keep talking. Deliver the definition

5. Definition: You know, I can tell you were at a bit of a loss for words there. But I think I can understand where you are coming from emotionally in that shy, feminine, sensuality sort of way


You’ve challenged the hell out of her in the last section and she’s probably all at sea. She’ll probably say something. You may even have a superficial conversation. But at some point, it will be time for you now to convey that you are non judgemental. That should free her to express her feelings and opinion

1. Qualifier: But let me ask you this, “What is it that keeps you from being the most feminine woman you can be?”

2. Grounding: What I mean by this is, that for me, growing up in India society keeps you in line by judging you constantly. I don’t know if it is the same here, but when I hit puberty, I suddenly started feeling all these strange wonderful delightful feelings. But somehow I was taught to be ashamed of them. You know, that’s how society controls you. They take something completely natural and make you ashamed of it. That way you are locked in an eternal struggle with yourself and before you know it, you are under their control as all your energy is locked up in your internal struggle. So anyway, there was this girl in class when I was in the 9th grade. (Tell the story of a girl in class you were attracted to and had all these strange feelings for but you were ashamed that you were attracted to her. And you did not want anyone to know as you were afraid of being judged. And while you were struggling this way, some guy you really disliked went for this girl and got her.) And you know what I realized, that part of this fear of judgement that I had was because I was a pretty judgemental guy myself. And with that I lost all my judgementality. I mean who am i to judge someone else. Have I been through what they have been through? Have I walked a mile in their shoes? Have I suffered what they suffered? And then I realized that what I like, what I desire, what I want is nothing to be ashamed of. It is just natural. 

Great….let her talk and say something. Once she’s done, hit her with the challenge

3. Challenge: So let me ask you this and I can tell, you will give me a really good answer from you unique perspective, but what is it that you really want from a guy? 

If done right, she will be all at sea all over again. Or she may say some PC stuff or she may even be willing to play (unlikely in Singapore), but let’s assume it is gonna be PC. So you have some more work to do. Time for the definition

4. Definition: See actually I have an idea what you want, but you don’t feel open enough to tell me, but I think you value someone who can really connect with you…..kinda how we’re talking now……we’re having a really open conversation. Because I think if people could see this side of you……, you’d feel really attractive and much more of a woman. So let me ask you this? When do you feel really attractive? *let her talk*. When is the last time you felt like a woman? 

Once she opens up, compliment her, compliment her on her opening up. Tell her how most people can’t open up, are intimidated by the prospect of opening up, but I myself am drawn to that side of her as a moth to a flame and felt like I just had to draw out that side of her. 


Okay that’s enough for now. Too much theory at this point. Must go out and put this to practice. Let’s see if things happen as we planned it out in this chapter. And based on feedback from the field, we can re-visit and modify this chapter. 


About masculineffort

A Man should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, seduce a woman, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects.
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One Response to The Femininity Routine

  1. Joe says:

    Hey, are you still in Singapore?

    Interested in daygame?

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